We have a 4 year old son. When he was 2 years old, he did not babble, point or call papa mama. We were worried and tried to seek advice from our parents and friends. Our parents felt we were worrying unnecessarily, as boys tend to develop speech slower, as compared to girls. “Just give him more time!” as what they always say. But we knew something was amiss. The pediatrician saw warning signs, and referred us to specialists to get help.

The long road ahead
We visited a few specialists and psychologists who assessed our child based on a hour’s observation and a series of questionnaires. Our son was assessed on a few areas including his motor skills, ability to respond to questions and instructions etc. The specialists were making him doing various activities like stacking blocks, completing jig saw puzzle, responding to questions on shapes and colors as well as drawing lines and dots.

Parents were then asked questions based on their questionnaires. The questionnaires responses coupled with the observation checklist were then scored, before they came to a conclusion. In less than 90 minutes, my son was confirmed to have speech developmental delay and short attention span. To date, none of the specialists we saw dared to ‘label’ my son autistic in view of his young age. Most specialists recommended us to seek a speech therapist and an occupational therapist to rectify my son’s speech delay and short attention span.

My son is like a guinea pig
In Singapore, finding good therapists to work with your child is a challenging task. The weekend appointments are almost full, and some therapists we spoke to were unsympathetic of our situation. Not to mention the exorbitant fees they were charging per session!

We researched the internet and relied on the specialists’ and friends’ recommendations. After much effort, we are able to short list a few speech and occupational therapists. My wife made a series of appointments for my son to attend. Almost every week, we have an appointment to attend. A speech therapy session entails playing games to encourage two way communications and reading of story books. An occupational therapy session involves my son to go through some obstacle course which will help him improve my son’s attention span

Turning Point
After weeks of speech and occupational therapy, I told my wife to reduce the number of sessions. I learnt some tricks from the specialists as I found that my son was doing the same thing for every session.

The turning point came when we brought our son to a 10 day self-drive trip to Perth. Animals was something closest to his heart, so we brought him to wildlife parks to see the Australian wildlife animals, Monkey Mia to see the wild dolphins, and a farm to let him have the experience of doing a farmstay and feed the animals there. Throughout the 10 days, we kept talking and interacting with him using the techniques the therapists taught us.

When we were back in Singapore, my son gradually started to babble animal names when he flipped through the Perth’s photos. It was so heartening to see his progress. He can name most animals and even the unique Australian animals like badgers, koala bear. We were so proud of him.

Lessons Learnt
The 3 key lessons that my wife and I learnt through the whole ordeal are:
1. Parents’ time with their child is very important in a child’s development. (In the beginning, we were weekend parents and “outsourced” looking after our son during the weekdays to our in-laws.)
2. Never give up and see your child negatively. Each child is unique. Have faith in your own child. Parents are there to help to unlock the child’s potential.
3. Take what specialists tell you as a form of guidance on how you can help your child. Don’t take it as a final sentence on how your child will be labeled for life.

Always remember that what has changed is not your child, but your perception of your child.